Employee to Company: "We’re Just Not That Into You"

During it’s 6 year run, my wife and I were diligent watchers of the HBO series “Sex in the City” (we now watch the reruns in the evening – over and over and over again). One of my favorite episodes was where the character Miranda had described a particular date with a man who seemed to be giving off mixed messages about his feelings for her.

A man who heard this lament fired off the now famous line -”he’s just not that into you“.

The line came from Greg Behrendt, a writer on the show, who went on to write a best selling book of the same name.

Greg was certainly onto something – as he put it, “if a (sane) guy really likes you, there ain’t nothing that’s going to get in his way”. In other words, anything less than head-over-heels enthusiasm and devotion just ain’t the real thing.

It turns out that in the working world that the same scenarios are playing out. Companies and their top management putter along with the business thinking that at the very least a majority of their employees are “into” them (i.e. truly engaged), but in actual fact, they are not.

Look at these statistics: A 2005 Towers Perrin survey found that just 14 percent of workers were fully engaged on the job. Another survey by DDI said only 19 percent were “into” it, and The Corporate Executive Board pegged the number at 11 percent.

Sobering stuff.

Just like Miranda, leaders need to stop kidding themselves and realize that in order to be truly successful, they need many more of their teammates to be enthusiastic and passionate believers in the company, and more importantly, believers in them.

How can a leader do this, when based on the statistics it’s a quite difficult task?

One approach is found in the NY Times in a column which noted a piece in Pink magazine written by Karen Benjack Glatzer, who said:

“A manager who wants to engage and develop talent must look to her own motivation first, experts say. That’s because employees want their managers to be role models for growth and ongoing learning.”

That’s a very interesting point to ponder, because I’m sure (based on my own experience) that many leaders don’t spend a lot of time thinking about how they can be better role models. More “nuts and bolts” type activities typically fill their time.

Another interesting clue for employee engagement improvement was in an article in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette entitled “Boss Sets the Tone for Employee Morale“. The premise there? Fix the big bosses, not the direct supervisors. That seems so counter intuitive, doesn’t it?

In a Towers Perrin survey, employees said that the the tone set by senior managers when it comes to the employees well-being was the single most important element in keeping them engaged in the business. The relationship with direct reports was listed as the ninth most important element.

I guess my old boss was so right when he kept telling me that “a fish stinks from its head down” – another way of saying that the tones, attitudes, and philosophies of executive management deeply permeate an organization, and if they are off-kilter, the whole company is off-kilter.

It seems so elementary, so basic – but yet so many people “are just not that into” real employee engagement.

Maybe the answer is to just get more executives to watch Sex In the City – and by the way, they are now making a movie with all the original characters that is coming out next spring. Little do they know that the future of management hangs in the balance……..

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